You know what sucks?  Having people ask you for stuff and you have to be a doormat about it.  Every time this one girl sees me chewing gum, she asks for a piece, and I can't refuse her or else I look like a prick.  So I would lose some of my own gum to a girl I find annoying.  She chews incredibly loudly and takes in this odd tone where she drags on words for now reason, and I know that isn't something she can't fix.  And when people ask for paper I HAVE to give them the nice paper because it would look odd for me to bring out a different kind of paper for them.  But in all cases, there is nothing I can do, it doesn't matter how much was stolen from me, I have to do it so I don't look like an ass.

Love Lifes

I don't even anymore.  A few months ago, I asked my friend if he was crushing on anyone, slightly hoping he would say me, do to the fact he posted he was crushing on a friend.  When he said someone else, my heart broke into pieces.  The bell eventually rung, but I felt shaky and when I went to my bus, I curled up and cried.  He, to this day, never knew what he did to me.  Weeks pass, and I feel ready to tell him "I have no time for our friendship" but could never get the words out.  We drifted apart but got our friendship back on track.  But now, I hold no emotional baring to him anymore, but what I felt for him is still a sensitive area for me.  I'm even crying as I write this, it's that bad.  We talk a lot, and he is one of my best friends, I can't change that between us.  But I have been told by one of his friends he loves me but...I can't believe it, at all.  I told the friend I don't believe him, but he kept trying to shove the evidence in my face.  He talked about the fact "you guys always talk to each other on the bus", but we don't ride the same bus.  I told him, and that my friend's crush could be the same one as a few months ago.  It was more than painful to tell my friend's friend that.  I felt so conflicted and confused.  People have recently asked "Oh, are you guys dating?"  "Do you want to get in her pants?"  and other comments.  I told them with such a ferocity "No, we aren't.".  I feel like drifting apart from him again, no matter how close he is to me, no matter how hurt I am when we don't talk, everything just because I don't want to go through what I went through.  I just want him to be the guy I cry to, who I admit my problems to.  I want him to be happy, I really do, even if he does love me.  But I can't.  I am not ready for commitment, unlike what I thought months ago.  I have no idea what to do.  I just wanted to let it out.  I no longer feel butterflies around him, I just want to talk to him, show off my newest collectable or comic to him and see his eyes light up.  I wanna be comforted about all my dark feelings and hear his, but I can't recall many times I really heard how he feels, just how I feel.


He has what I think are signs of affection, like texting me and trying his best to sit near me, but I avoid him til he starts talking.  I still think he likes the girl he told me about a few months ago, but I don't really hear him talk about her.


While writing this, I just want to disappear and see how he fairs and everyone.  I just want to be away from this and the stress and anxiety I already have.  We are so close, in fact, I told him something I never told anyone else, I have "panic attacks" in the lunchroom, and must look at the ground and do breathing exercises to stop myself from the "stares" of people and their laughter.  I just hate to think anyone is laughing at me.  When I do look up its for mere seconds and I run to my seat.  It has gotten worse over time.  I just used to look at the ground.  Now, when I don't breathe I feel, odd, compressed.

I have also been told he is normally shy, but seems to be more open with me.  Please tell me what the heck is going on, since I don't even know.

I think Roxas and Axel have a father-son relationship instead of a romance

I mean, think about it, Axel is there for Roxas, and felt betrayed when he couldn't remember him, like a father who has grown distant from his son.  They don't act romantic (at least, not necessarily).  I can't think of much other reasoning, so I'll leave it at this.

My Arguments With A Troll (Is about bronies)

UGH!  I just got into an online argument with some troll, and it went on to escalate, even though I just pointed out the flaws in his arguments that not all bronies are pedophiles, autistic, child molesting scum, to tell me my brony friends are obviously pedophiles in disguise!  I defended my friends, obviously, but NO he wasn't having that!  He told me he hated to be the one to break it to me and it is always those you least expect!  I am getting angrier and angrier at him and he fails to cite his sources for his "claims"!  Agh, I swear, you can't even speak to these kind of trolls and try to bring in reason instead of anger.  I am not going to reveal his name, even trolls need privacy.  And guess what?  His comment started on a peaceful, instrumental that was supposed to be Rarity's theme.


Our comments (basically what we said, but not exactly, except for my arguments, they are untouched,):
 
Him: All bronies are child molesting, autistic people who constantly fap to cartoon pony porn.  You should all be locked up or killed.  Please commit suicide, it would make the world a better place.

Me: That is your opinion, and although I don't agree, you have the right to it.  However, I don't appreciate the generalization of us bronies.  I mean, I would agree if you cited evidence of your claims that shows all bronies are "autistic child molesters (I have yet to see a single autistic, child molesting brony) , jack off to pony porn (I have seen several bronies against this, so that claim is out the window) and the music part is just an opinion.  Do you have proof mankind would be better if all bronies killed themselves?  How much pain would the family members be if we all committed suicide?  Also, bronies have done wonderful things (See:http://broniesforgood.org/seeds-of-kindness-3/) so I personally think (this is without evidence) bronies actually make the world a better place

Him: (A direct quote) "Fuck off, closet pedophile :)"

Me: If this is how you choose to respond, so be it, but you shouldn't just assume people are pedophiles when you have never ever met them or know their name.  Especially because you choose to use it as an insult, something that term wasn't meant for.  It is means people who are older than 16 who are sexually attracted to persons who haven't hit puberty/are still children.  (Source: http://www.thefreedictionary.com/pedophile) I must say, for an "internet troll" you aren't doing it that good.  Any person who is willing to call a general group of people pedophiles, child molesters, autistic, etc.  should use actual logic in any form of accusation.  If not, you are just spouting random "logic" and it makes you seem idiotic.  However, even though I dislike people like you, love and tolerance to all.  I am just stating what is wrong with what you claim.  Good day

Him: So pedophilia is okay in your eyes?  I take this as proof of my comment.

Me: I am not saying it is okay, I am merely stating you shouldn't classify someone as that if you don't know them nor of their actions.  You also shouldn't use it as an insult for people you have a disagreement over.  Cite your evidence of us bronies being pedophiles, I would like to see what credible site days this, what statistics they have and viable evidence.  

Him: I am stating this as fact, all bronies are pedophiles.  I know the facts.

Me: But you aren't citing evidence!  You keep trying to push that all bronies are pedophiles (and I know my friends aren't pedophiles due to the fact I have gotten to personally bonded with them and know them like the back of my hand.  You would think I would see their attraction to children if they were pedophiles.) but have no evidence to support you claim.  And you are still using it as an insult when pedoophile is a label meant for people who have an attraction towards children.

Him: But it is in those you least expect.  Sorry to break it to you.

And that's where I left off and thought I was done talking to this guy.  

BASES WITH CRAP ART RANT~

Haha, I felt I needed a short and sweet rant.  For the few who even glanced at this blog, let me state that I am a hobbyist writer and artist, and have a DeviantArt.  I am a member in a group and when I make an adopt, it will most likely go there.  I only sold one adopt, ever, and I have noticed the ones that are commonly adopted are the ultra-detailed-not-my-type-of-style or base models.  Now, I have no problem with bases but I feel incredibly envious when I see adopts that have been sold with uses minimal effort, and only using a base, some splashes of color here and generic hair and body shape.  I draw my own works, not using any bases (I used to, until I started to slowly improve) but not two thoughts are put into them by others.  I don't get it, am I doing something wrong that makes my work unpleasing to others?  It just, sucks, to put it sweetly.

Holy crap, my writing got a 6, along with some other girl in my class.  Although, I question the standards to get a 6 due to the fact my fanfictions can be better than this.  The whole thing composed of my repeating the same "I would.." and reused some ideas, just changing them up a bit.  Maybe if it was a fantasy work instead of an expository, I would be prouder of my work but frankly, staring at it makes me cringe.  I'll rewrite that junk later, I am too busy writing fanfiction and staying up to four on reddit.  Good night, you nocturnal peeps.

The Flaws of Princess Twilight Sparkle/Review of Princess TS Part One

Now, let me get this straight.  I do not hate Twilight for becoming an alicorn, unlike some when it was revealed.  Now, about nine months later, season four came of with a kicker.  However, that is not the point, for now.  You see, I slightly think Twilight become an alicorn is...to say the least, iffy.  I mean, her friends helped her where she is today but she got the pair of wings.  This means she has a whole new social standing, although it was needed for her character.  She was meant to become a princess from the start and I am glad she was able to obtain such a high up position.  I also have a feeling Twilight would have to begin to see her friends less because she is a princess but it does leave a whole world of possibilities.  Now onto my actual review of the episode.


I feel that when Twilight said not to address her differently, that was when I knew Twilight was still Twilight...but with a fancy pair of wings.  Quote from the episode "If other ponies want to address me that way, I suppose it's fine, but, not my friends.  It just doesn't feel right.".  The writers want us to know Twilight isn't going to become snobbish or change and still has the same feeling for her friends as she always has.  That is heartwarming.  In the scene where that came from, Rainbow Dash is teaching Twilight how to fly for the Summer Sun Celebration for the "big finale", something Twilight isn't too good at (control wise).  But, this makes me question, how long has Twilight been in Ponyville?  Anyways, I feel it is a bit odd to see Twilight go so fast, until I saw her crash into some clouds, that was hilarious!  Did I mention this was an amazing two parter?  It was less problems that A Canterlot Wedding and I feel has much better pacing than the Return of Harmony.  

The new opening isn't all too different and I noticed an error with it, at least I think it was an error.  In the first few seconds of the opening, Twilight is still a unicorn.  But, there were some differences.  Like, did any of you notice Discord is behind a window in Fluttershy's scene?  I sure didn't until a couple of watchings.  Also, the photo with some minor characters was new as well, a nice touch.  And this time, it shows Luna and Celestia, with Luna peeking at the newly appeared scroll.  Nice to see the animators know she is still a princess and important.  


I am not quite sure what to feel with all the Mane 6 fawning over Twilicorn, I mean, I know they are proud of her but it seems a bit too excessive.  Ah well, just a nit pick.  But a fantastic line by Rainbow Dash which I quote "I don't know if it's everypony's dream" when talking about being a princess.  Nice touch writers.  Did any of you also notice how well done the animation is?  I mean...wow!  It looks absolutely stunning, with all the shading and lighting.  (Silly me, I am gushing, aren't I?  Sorry, this two parter is too good!)  Applejack tells Twilight to cheer up because she gets to be by the side of the other three princesses after she talks about working on the Summer Sun Celebration preparation.  Then Rarity comments that it doesn't feel right not being with Twilight on such a special day but AJ says it may be a special day, but they are always united.  That is so sweet!  Oh and Pinkie Pie is drooling about cakes in the corner, I must admit, it got a chuckle out of me, but not full on laughter.  Some gags happen, but I won't cover those since they aren't the most relevant to the plot except Twilight feels she is already missing them as the others go back to Ponyville.



Twilight is shown worried that they if they go back to Ponyville, a bunch of junk will happen.  Celestia comes in to reassure her that things will be fine....before stepping out of the room and getting stolen by....something!  Twilight falls asleep and when she awakes sees both the Sun and the Moon are out, at the same time!  When she goes outside, is asked questions about what is going on.  She goes inside the palace once more and is told that Celestia and Luna have disappeared and getting Cadence isn't an option since she is ruling her own empire.  The palace guards tell her now that the Royal Sisters are gone, they now serve under Twilight's command.  I think it was nice to show she can take charge and rule, even under the circumstances she was in.  She takes charge and says to continue the search for the two and is then told the Everfree is invading...and how does a forest invade?  By freaking evil vines, of course!


In Ponyville, the Mane 6 encounter the invading Everfree, like how the clouds are now dark and spiky or how the vines are getting in the Apple Orchard or how it affects unicorn magic.




Sorry I had to cut this short, I felt having a bit of time between the two parts of the review would be good.